What to expect when you're....

NOT expecting....

Expect...

- All of your friends, close relatives, celebrities, random strangers all to be expecting

- Unexpected outbursts of tears in public places do to spotting such gestating females or small infants

- Increased fighting with the husband keeping you from expecting

- Increased desire to hold, squeeze, stare at, or steal other people's babies

- Sudden yearnings to nuzzle, swaddle, and rock small animals

- Frequent urges to punch almost every single person in relief society from the constant baby update

- Headaches, overeating, depression, mood swings , did I mention crying?

- you know....the works!

See your doctor if you have any of these symptoms


 (most likely he can't fix it for you, but at least you'll feel like someone is pretending to listen to you)